At community events around Wichita, A Centered Life often hands out free resources to help people navigate everyday challenges. From our Overthinking Survival Pack to Self-Care Without Guilt, we offer practical tools people can use in real life. But the handout that disappears the fastest? The one about sleep.
It turns out that a lot of people are struggling to get a good night's rest.
Sleep problems can have many causes, and for some people, nightmares are part of the picture. A bad dream every once in a while is one thing. But when nightmares leave you terrified, disrupt your sleep, or make you dread going to bed, they can take a real toll on your well-being.
Why Are We So Fascinated by Dreams?
I'll admit it: dreams have always fascinated me. I enjoy trying to dissect those bizarre dreamscapes featuring giant ogres, spiraling staircases, deep purple skies, and oceans suspended overhead. Seriously, where does our brain come up with this stuff?
But scary dreams that leave me terrified, hyperventilating, and shaky when I wake up? No thanks. I'd rather get a good night's sleep!
Sometimes a dream is just a dream, and there's no need to analyze every strange detail. Other times, our dreams may reflect stress, fear, unresolved emotions, or experiences we're still trying to make sense of. While nightmares don't always have a hidden meaning, paying attention to recurring themes or emotions can sometimes offer useful insight into what we're experiencing in our waking lives.
When Nightmares Become a Recurring Problem
There's a difference between having an occasional nightmare and experiencing the same frightening dreams over and over again.
For some people, nightmares happen so frequently that bedtime itself becomes a source of anxiety. They may put off going to sleep, struggle to fall back asleep after waking, or spend the next day feeling exhausted.
Recurring nightmares can be especially difficult because they can leave us feeling powerless twice: first, while we're experiencing the nightmare, and again when we realize we can't seem to stop it from happening.
The good news? There are ways to work toward feeling more in control of your nightmares.
One approach you can try is called rewriting the dream script. For some people, this can be a helpful way to change how they experience a recurring nightmare. Let's look at how it works.
Remember the Boggart scene in Harry Potter? Students face a magical creature that takes the form of whatever frightens them most. To defeat it, they imagine their fear transformed into something ridiculous and say, "Riddikulus!" Suddenly, the terrifying creature becomes something silly instead.
What if we approached our nightmares with a similar idea?
When we're caught in a nightmare, we may feel scared, helpless, trapped, or unsafe. Rewriting the dream script means imagining a different way for the story to unfold—one in which you have more agency, safety, confidence, or control.
Here's an example from my own childhood.
I once had a nightmare about the Wicked Witch chasing me as we tumbled through the chaos of a tornado. Not exactly a relaxing bedtime story!
To rewrite the dream, I imagined looking the witch directly in the eyes and watching her shrink until she was tiny enough to fit inside a glass jar. Then, I changed the setting. Instead of chaos and destruction, I imagined myself standing in the peaceful Kansas Flint Hills.
The witch was no longer a threat, and I was safe.
I never had that nightmare again.
Will this work for everyone? No. But it illustrates an important idea: You don't have to keep the nightmare's original ending.
You can experiment with changing the setting, introducing a helpful character, giving yourself a way to escape, or transforming the frightening element into something harmless or even funny. The goal isn't necessarily to make the scary thing disappear. It's to imagine yourself responding to it differently, from a place of greater confidence, safety, and control.
Your imagination gives you room to explore possibilities that weren't available to you in the original dream.
If you'd like to give this a try, here's one way to get started.
Step 1: Identify what you want to happen instead.
Think about a recurring nightmare and consider how you'd like it to end. What would help you feel safe, capable, or in control? You don't have to make the dream perfect. Start by imagining a different outcome.
Step 2: Break the dream into scenes.
Walk through the nightmare in your imagination, one scene at a time, and decide how you'd like each part to unfold. You might change the setting, give yourself a different response, introduce someone who can help, or create a way out of a frightening situation.
Step 3: Rehearse your new version.
Once you've created an alternative storyline, practice imagining it from beginning to end. Try rehearsing the new version for a few minutes each day while you're awake, rather than waiting until bedtime. Repeating the new script can help you become more familiar with this alternative version of the dream.
Step 4: Plan for obstacles.
What if the frightening person or situation shows up again? What if the scene changes unexpectedly? Think through what might make you feel unsafe, then decide how you'd like to respond. You could give yourself a superpower, summon help, create a safe place, or change the scene entirely.
Rehearse those moments, too. The more you practice your new storyline, the more opportunities you have to imagine responding in a way that feels safer and more empowering.
And remember, you can get creative! Your rewritten dream doesn't have to follow the rules of the real world.
When Is It Time to Get Professional Help for Nightmares?
Rewriting a nightmare can be a useful starting point, but recurring nightmares can have different causes. Stress, traumatic experiences, certain medications, sleep disorders, and other factors may contribute to them.
If nightmares happen frequently, interfere with your sleep, affect your daily life, or cause you to dread going to bed, consider talking with your doctor or a mental health professional. They can help you explore possible triggers and determine what approach may be most helpful.
A therapist can also guide you through imagery rehearsal techniques and help you work through the emotions or experiences connected to recurring nightmares. If your nightmares are related to trauma, having professional support can be particularly important.
You don't have to figure it all out on your own.
Sleep should be a time to recharge, not something you fear. If nightmares are keeping you up at night, there are ways to work toward feeling safer, sleeping better, and regaining a sense of control.
At A Centered Life, we help people navigate the things that make everyday life harder—including stress, anxiety, and the lingering effects of difficult experiences.
If recurring nightmares are affecting your sleep or quality of life, we'd love to help you explore your options.
You deserve to feel more at ease when you close your eyes at night. Let's work toward helping you feel more centered in the chaos of life, even when that chaos seems to follow you into your dreams.
Contact A Centered Life and we can help you get connected to a therapist.
Sarah Beardslee
,
LCPC
How to Handle Social Anxiety Without Letting It Run Your Life
H. Meaghan Greer
,
LPC
Life is life, and it's intense these days! Relationships, work drama, family...
